People deal with stress in different ways. I am a self proclaimed control freak, 100% type A. So, as you can only imagine, cancer has thrown me for a loop. I am most definitely not in control of what is growing inside my body and all of the medication/surgeries I will have to endure, just to live. However, I took control of the situation, in other ways.
Immediately, I started researching the best diets for starving cancer. I figured, I can't control much, but I can control what I eat and give my body the best fuel to keep fighting. The drastic change in diet was pretty easy since I didn't eat much for the first 10-14 days anyway. Shock has a funny way of doing that. Then, as my appetite would perk up, I started eating the rainbow. Lots of whole foods, in many different colors and flavors. Honestly, it has been very simple for me. I was checking out at Trader Joe's the other day and in Rifka fashion, struck up a conversation with the cashier. We talked briefly about my grocery choices and he gave let me know that he liked a lot of what I picked out.
The guy was so nice and friendly. He said "wow, vegan, that takes a lot of disciplined". I said, "well you see, sometimes life catapults you into the direction you have to go and it's much easier then." He caught my drift and kindly asked what that was for me. I quickly told him about my recent diagnosis and that I will eat to live not live to eat. After he said a sweet prayer for me and sent me on my way.
The purpose for that story is to let you know when your why is big enough, you'll figure out your how. For me, my why is definitely big enough.
Another change I made was this here writing space. These entries serve several purposes. Getting my inner dialog on paper is not only cathartic and therapeutic, but also a way of documenting my fight, maybe to look back on in the future to see how far I had come. I hope this space can be useful for a women getting diagnosed after me. Maybe to help her understand what is happening next or let her know she isn't alone. Hopefully, it will bring awareness to the readers to self-check, because you just don't know when a boob will go homicidal. And lastly, I wanted a place where my friends and family can find the latest update easily.
I may have gone over board with the label maker, trying to label everything around the house, organizing more than usual to make things easier for my down days, but this, my friends, is how I deal with stress. I have cancer, but life still goes on.